April 18th, 2016

[podcast] How to Say No Nicely #016

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This week’s show comes to you from the ball field (near the port-a-potty!) and we are talking about saying “no” nicely. Why do we nee this topic? Because so many of us are so very bad at setting boundaries! We talk about some ways to prioritize your commitments and prepare yourself ahead of time so that you don’t wind up committing to things you don;t value at the expense of yourself or your family.

We all need this topic! Just thinking things through ahead of time and being ready with a phrase like “Let me think about that and get back to you” or “I love what you are doing, but I just cant commit to participating right now” can be very helpful in the moment when you are tempted to say YES out of guilt or anything less than a real desire to spend your time on that thing.

This week I share a recent conversation I had with Minnesota Mom, Margaret Berns, whom I have known and loved online and IRL for many years. Margaret shares the good, the bad, the ugly and is unafraid to take on even the toughest of topics — depression and sex. You know you need to hear what she has to say!

This week’s Girlfriends Shout-out goes to listener Carmen who wrote to share that, despite her hurt feelings and suffering a recent miscarriage, she is making an effort to spend more time alone with her husband in order to improve her marriage. A very inspiring small act of generosity and love during a difficult time. You inspire me, Carmen!

This week’s challenge is to consider how you feel about saying NO in your life. What could use some work? Plan now for how you are going to say NO the next time you need to and prioritize your personal commitments in a way that lines up with your values.

I share feedback from listener Dena who asks for advice about kids owning/sharing toys, and from Erica in Orlando who shares her thoughts about Girlfriends. Thanks so much, ladies!

Thank you, as always, for being here. Your encouragement and support of Girlfriends means so much and I am so grateful for your presence here. God bless your week!

Links for this episode:
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About Danielle Bean
Danielle’s Books on Amazon
Catholic Digest
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Margaret Berns
Margaret’s website
Books mentioned:
The Sexually Confident Wife: Connecting With Your Husband Mind Body Heart Spirit
The Love Dare
Margaret’s S-E-X blog posts:
A Free Pre Valentines Message
About Last Night
Reflections on the Feast


crying Daniel

Other Things Mentioned in This Episode
Together In Holiness (Catholic marriage conferences)

Email Danielle Bean
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Danielle Bean on Facebook
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2 comments to [podcast] How to Say No Nicely #016

  • Angel Olson

    Hello Danielle! As a mom of six kids from Wisconsin, I’m looking for some advice in the “girl drama” arena. My oldest is 12 and in 6th grade. This is the first time we have encountered this drama and am wondering if you have any advice on teaching your kids to choose their friends wisely and making sure those friends are helping them grow closer to Christ. Also for moms and dads and how to navigate our hearts when the drama enters our family and is causing hurt to our children. Any great preteen devotionals that talk about this subject?

    One more question unrelated to drama. With six kids we are always looking for great book series to read as a family. Any suggestions??? We’ve done Anne Of Green Gables, the 15 books of the Wizard of Oz, Wrinkle in Time, Narnia, and Harry Potter.

  • Hi Angel! Thanks for listening and thanks so much for your questions. I think the friendship one is SO important. I will take that up in a podcast soon, and I will give some thought to resources for you. Those pre-teen/teen years an be so tricky! I like the idea of soliciting read aloud suggestions as well. I will give a call out for those next week.

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