May 9th, 2016

[podcast] How to Make and Keep Friends #019

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This week we are talking about friendships. We discussed a little bit about the give and take of female friendships back in Episode 12, How to Be a Better Friend, and I heard form many of you asking for more on this topic. This is so important because our female friends can be a wonderful source of support and encouragement for us, but it does take some effort. Some ideas to keep in mind:

Know your personality type. Socialization comes easier to some of us than others. If you are painfully shy, recognize that this is something you will need to work on, and set some reasonable friendship goals. If you are naturally outgoing and at ease in social situations, you might consider that God is calling you to be more of an initiator in your friendships, to balance out the shyness of others.

Pray about it. Many of us say friends are important to us, or that we struggle to find friends, but how many of us bring this topic to prayer? God knows the support you need, he knows your loneliness. Go to him and ask him to help fill the desires of your heart. Trust that he will.

Consider how well you offer and receive help. This is what friendships are made of — the back and forth of giving and receiving support form one another. But sometimes our pride gets in the way of us graciously receiving the help from others, or our insecurity prevents us from offering real support to others. Give some thought to ways you can improve your approach to both of these — giving and receiving help.

Maintaining friendships takes time and effort. So once you’ve made a friend, how do you keep her? Friendships require nurturing. You can’t ignore your friend for months because you are “busy” and then expect her to drop everything and pay attention to you when you are ready. It’s ok to be busy sometimes, but recognize that if friendships are important to you, they are worth the time and effort it takes to maintain them.

Let me know your thoughts on friendship. I would love to hear your stories, struggles, and triumphs with female friendship in your life.

This week I share a fun conversation I had with Marybeth Hicks, author, speaker, columnist, and radio host. She and I discuss parenting successes and failures, and how we can raise our kids to be “geeks.” I just love everything that Marybeth had to share, with humor and humility, and I know you will too.

Marybeth Hicks
Marybeth’s website
Marybeth’s Books:
The perfect World Inside My Minivan
Bringing Up Geeks: How to Protect Your Kid’s Childhood in a Grow-Up-Too-Fast World
Teachable Moments: Using Everyday Encounters with Media and Culture to Instill Conscience, Character, and Faith
Don’t Let the Kids Drink the Kool-Aid: Confronting the Assault on Our Families, Faith, and Freedom
Marybeth on Twitter

This week’s challenge is to examine your approach to female friendships in light of what we talked about today. Do you have good friends? Do you spend the necessary time working on and maintaining friendships? How good are you at ¬†giving and receiving inside of friendship? Find an area that could use improvement and take a step toward improving that this week — even if it means stepping outside of your comfort zone!

I share feedback from listener Natalie who is grateful for Margaret Berns’ honesty and openness about sex in episode 16. The books she mentions is The Sexually Confident Wife. Also Patreon supporter Dena connects via Voxer!

Also, thank you to David (a dude is listening!) for your kind encouragement of us ladies, and thanks to Jessica and Ann-Marie who left reviews on iTunes this week. You can leave a review too! Thanks so much for your support! And thank you, as always, for being here. Your encouragement and support of Girlfriends means so much and I am so grateful for your presence here. God bless your week!


Girlfriends is on Patreon! Find out how you can pledge your support for Girlfriends at

Also mentioned in this episode:

My new book! Here is a look at the cover and some information about its content.

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1 comment to [podcast] How to Make and Keep Friends #019

  • Denise RC

    I have to laugh. I grew up in SC so your story didn’t surprise me. Once I said “good morning” to couple I encountered on an early morning walk to work. The gentleman (in his heavy NY accent) asked me why I said that. His wife was “oh this is the South they say things like here”. I said “have a nice day” and quickly turned the corner. Had to laugh about it!!

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