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Hope you all enjoyed a wonderful long weekend.
I heard on the radio that there were 800,000 out of state visitors in New Hampshire this past weekend. That sounds about right. In fact, I think every last one of them was in line ahead of me at the deli on Sunday afternoon.
So what’s new with you? What would you like to talk about today?
[tags]catholic family life, coffee talk, catholic moms[/tags]
Kristina,
I am so sorry for your loss and will certainty remember you in my prayers.
Kristina,
I will pray for you and your precious family. May our Lord bring you and your beautiful children peace, strength and comfort.
Amy,
Would it be possible for your Mom in law to suggest that the couple talk to you since you have been there? This would give them the choice to talk to you if and when they /she is ready.
Help, I feel so wicked!,
Welcome to being human. I suspect that , right or wrong,many feel as you do wether they admit it or not. We all have opinions and I guess that the key is to respect others no matter how ludicrous they may seem. I know of people who have had one disabled child ( trisome 18, trisome 13, cystic fibrosis) and even though there chances of another being born with the same were no more than 50/50, chose not to take the chance that they could bring another disabled child into this cruel world. By the same token I know of people who trust in God and accept that he will be with them no matter what and have several children with a slim chance of them being born healthy . I have the up most respect for both groups and personally don’t know what I would do if in their position.
Jill,
My dh and I are ministers for Catholic Engaged Encounter and I believe the Marriage Encounter weekend is similar to ours. If so, you will hear talks from couples on various issues. We also have a priest on our weekends who speaks of his experiences with the same topics. There are a few other “surprises” too.
Their website is probably intentionally vague so that your experience is unique to your interpretation.
Kristina-
I am so sorry for your loss! You will be in our Rosary intentions today. May God give you the peace and strength to endure this trial.
Jill,
My husband and I were a presenting team couple for Worldwide Marriage Encounter for twelve years.
We went on our first Marriage Encounter weekend in 1995 and it was (and still is) the best thing we ever did for our marriage. It was the beginning of a period of amazing growth in our relationship and the source of so much spiritual and emotional support for our marriage – through small-faith sharing groups that are available after a couple has made the weekend. We have made wonderful friends that we still socialize with monthly and have raised our children together.
As Alicia mentioned, the format of the weekend is a series of talks given by three married couples and a priest. Topics include communication, keeping our relationship a priority and God’s plan for our marriage. After the talks, couples go back to their rooms for private conversations and time alone together. It is a very emotionally intense, but private experience and I believe it is well worth attending for any couple looking to get some time alone with each other to rekindle the romance of their early days together.
I’m sure you and your husband will have a wonderful weekend!
Kristina, my prayers are with you and your children at this difficult time.
Kristina
I am offering up my prayers and my day and my sufferings for you. My children will be praying for you as well. We will continue to pray for you during this difficult time. I hope that you have help with the kids so you can take some time to process all this. I wish I could come help you myself. May God bless you.
To Feeling wicked–
About the child–I would say that it’s all up to God, right? If she gets pregnant than God wanted her family to have this child.
I am not unbiased on this–I was diagnosed with cystic fibrosis when I was 11 years old . By then, my mom had already given birth to my two younger siblings, so whether or not our family would have more children wasn’t an issue. Even though there have been a lot of medical issues (I had a lung transplant 3 years ago, when I was 23), I am so thankful that my parents gave me the gift of life. I have loved every minute of it.
Suffering does not negate the enjoyment of life–in fact, for me, it has made every day even more precious.
Kristina,
You have my prayers. My heart is swelled with tears thinking of you and your children.
Kristina,
My prayers are with you and your family.
Kristina,
You will be in our thoughts and prayers, be assured of our love and support during this time. God bless your family.
Youth group: My husband was paid/volunteer for over 20 yrs. We worked with all ages and programs. The 2 things I would say are:
1) ALWAYS keep it spiritual (while having fun)– every YMCA/city/school has functions that are social–they don’t get to hear the TRUTH very often. Don’t underestimate their desire for the challenge to live/be different than the rest of society. (Plus, you never know what’s in store the next hour, or day, for someone in the group who’s at your function tonight.)
2) Pray. Pray, Pray and protect yourself by being in step with your Pastor and his plans/desires for the group, it’s hopeless without his support.
Kristina, I am praying for you and your children. I am so sorry for your loss.
Hayley, are there any little girls in your neighborhood or at church in the 9 to 11 age range? Perhaps they would be willing to come over for an hour in the afternoon to watch the toddler while you nap or get dinner on. I’ve paid “mother’s helpers” one or two dollars an hour for their huge help.
Also, I have put on Sesame Street or a Thomas video, blocked all exits from the room, and snoozed on the couch while my tots watched a half hour or an hour of tv. If the baby is sleeping, you can even snuggle with the older children while they watch tv and you doze. (I don’t care what the pediatricians say…I’m talking about survival.)
Make sure your house is organized, decluttered and clean so that when the baby comes you don’t have mounds of mess facing you and making you feel guilty for napping. Put ALL toys in bins that the tot can not open and be selective in what you open and when.
Consider paper plates and bowls and cups for easy dinner clean up for a few months. If you have a bigger freezer, stock up on casseroles or other easy meals or pre-cook your own chicken or pre-chop onions and peppers or whatever kinds of things you normally use.
If you have generous parents, and are comfortable suggesting such a thing, request a few months of maid service every other week.
Make a weekly to-do list (wash kitchen floor, clean bathroom, etc), put it in a sheet protector and hang it up on the fridge. Use a dry erase marker to check things off. Show your husband. Tell him that after the baby comes, you will need him to help you with the house for a bit and these are the things that must be done. All he has to do is look and do anything that isn’t checked. (Husbands often want to help, but they don’t know how.) This will also keep you prioritized when you have a free few minutes.
And that means more time for napping.
Good luck!
RE: Yeast infection
I’m about 7 months pregnant and get yeast infections quite frequently when I am. Does any one know how to get rid of these things once and for all besides using monistat.
I can understand your feelings but I hope you can understand the other mothers’ feelings as well. She has three children who may not be healthy but who she wouldn’t wish away. I am sure the children, even through their own suffering, would not wish to have not been born. So she sees bringing another child into this world, even if they are unhealthy, as a blessing and is leaving their health up to God.
Kristina,
I too am offering up my day for you, and will continue to pray for your consolation. I can’t find any words to tell you how sorry I am for the loss of your dear husband.
Emily,
What a beautiful testimony! I have a severely autistic sister, and have been told by others that her life is not a “full life.” We know better. Now that my sister is an adult, my Mom has dedicated her life to working with the handicapped, and she loves them very much. Every life has infinite value, but it can be hard for people to see from a distance those moments when it is revealed.
A very sad thing in our society now is that handicapped people are being largely eliminated before they are born or even conceived. My Mom always points this out. It is a tremendous loss for all of us. We don’t want to see suffering, but Christ comes to us in suffering.
I don’t mean to imply that people who face such risks have an obligation to conceive. They clearly have grave reasons to avoid another pregnancy if they feel they should. But if these people love and adore their children like most of us do, and are not just trying to get to some magic number of kids, then they may be doing it to add more happiness to the world – not more unhappiness. Despite the possibility of suffering. Just my perspective.
Eat lots of yogurt. And as gross as this sounds, smearing some plain yogurt down there (and then wearing a pad so your underwear is dry) is really supposed to help and is safe for pregnant women.
Swim Diapers – We use cloth ones from Target, and love them. I’ve used the same ones for 2 kids so far and they’re holding up well. Totally worth the price.
Getting out of Bed – This is my friend’s idea and it worked for her. And I plan on using it when my little one starts sleeping in a bed. After you’ve had enough – you’ve given drinks, snacks, etc – you tell the child that if they get up again you’ll put them in their car seat. For their little boy it only took one time in the car seat and he didn’t get out of bed anymore. The nice thing about the car seat is that it is perfectly safe.
Nail Biting – Have you tried painting her finger nails with pretty nail polish? My daughter loves how pretty her fingers look, and then if anything she picks at the nail polish instead of biting them. Sometimes you have to do it everyday if they pick off the nail polish so fast. And I occassionally still do this for myself – I’m a horrible nail biter and I’ve tried everything.
Amy,
You may try eating more yogurt. I am not sure if the yogurt will actually get rid of an infection, but it sure helps prevent one…especially if you had to be on antibiotics for some other reason.
Yogurt helps balance out your bacteria; its worked for me.
I must admit that I have three small children and have not been sleep deprived with any. I get a little less sleep and am more tired throughout the day but my nights are usually quite good. I may be super lucky to have three kids who sleep well but I think part of it is because of co-sleeping, or the family bed as it is sometimes called. My newborns sleep close to me and the minute I hear them wiggling and waking up I nurse them and they fall right back to sleep, and I often fall back to sleep while nursing them. I have an almost two month old and he only wakes up once or twice a night and I nurse him right back to sleep so I do not lose sleep. My first two were 21 months apart and I was still getting enough sleep with a newborn and small toddler.
Now, even with co-sleeping you may just have a naturally fussy baby who doesn’t sleep well but if you were used to your first child sleeping in a crib and having to get up, nurse or tend to a bottle and then rock while feeding and putting the baby back to bed before climbing into your bed I can totally understand why you would be exhausted – I couldn’t do that several times a night and still get enough sleep.
Dear Amy-
Beside the above suggestions I had to cut sugar out of my diet and increase my water intake. I could not wear the support hose even though my veins were getting bad. Loose skirts and dresses are better than shorts or pants. No amn made fibers— all cotton!
Hope you get more comfortable.
Amy, yeast dominates every one of my pregnancies! Sometimes I feel like biting my fingers off because of the itch. Here are some things I’ve done:
Take a bath in warm water and a cup or two of apple cider vinegar. It has an instant effect–but not a long lasting one. Do this a couple times a day.
Consume more bacteria, either yogurt, or probiotic tablets. With the probiotics, you get what you pay for.
Cut sugar anywhere you can. The problem is, with yeast overgrowth, you often crave sugar more than usual. So really strive to eliminate white sugar from your diet.
Crazy suggestion: if you can, while you’re around the house, wear a skirt with no undies!
Often, late in a pregnancy, you can use monistat if these other home remedies don’t work. Watch for baby having thrush about a week after birth. If you’re breastfeeding, that can really make life miserable. But it’s easily treatable.
I can see your point of view of how it “seems” like she may be being selfish. Look at it from a different point of view. Would you CHOOSE to not have anymore children if you were told they all would be missing a hand, or a foot? Children adapt to things much better than we do as adults. If they don’t know any different, they will adapt well. If they are born with certain handicaps, that’s all they know. As far as worrying about what other people think of her disfigured children, that goes for any of us disfigured or not. It is a cruel world (those of us that homeschool totally know that!), but to prevent God from creating another soul. . .that’s not for us to decide. I have a couple of friends that, no way, would I want to be in their position. . . .I see them as Saints on Earth because they are tremendous women.
Pray about this. . .A LOT! When I hear her story about still being open to life with all the trials she goes through with her children already, why am I thinking I can’t be more receptive to having more children when mine are all pretty much healthy?
Kristina!
We will definitely say some prayers for you! We will mention you in our Rosary intentions!
My sister-in-law lost her husband a year and a half ago (he was 42) and they have 6 children. She is a very strong woman and you can tell, God well prepared her for this loss. I’m not saying she doesn’t miss him and I’m sure she’d love to have him back in the family, but he did have a death-bed conversion (he had cancer) and they know he is in Heaven taking care of their family now better than ever.
May you find comfort in the arms of our Lord.
God bless!
Kristina, Feeling Wicked, and Sleep Deprivation:
Kristina, My heart breaks for you. You and your children will be in my prayers.
To Sleep Deprived: Our first two children were 13 months apart. The first one was colicky and didn’t sleep well. The second was so content and slept very well, although I was still tired quite a bit. We used Baby Einstein videos to get us through the time when I was nursing and couldn’t watch the toddler closely. Remember, it’s only for a short time. Our second and third children were 16 months apart and that first year of the third child’s life was very difficult, but we got through it unscathed and now that the children are 6, 5, and 3 1/2, they are eachother’s playmates and we were happy to welcome a fourth a year ago.
To Feeling Wicked: It is better for a child to be brought into the world handicapped than not at all, right? Each child is a gift from God to love and to be loved. Love comes to all bodies, not only whole bodies. Disabled children are a special gift from God because their physical care requires so much more of us. Life is precious no matter what vehicle it arrives in!
Kristina,
My family is praying for you and your children, too. God bless you and surround you with His tender love and care.
Emily,
Your story is a reminder that all life is precious.
About 4 years ago I was enjoying remission from cancer when I began noticing symptoms again. My cancer had returned within my spinal fluid and at the same time, the doctor discovered I was pregnant with my 5th child. He told me I had no choice but to terminate the pregnancy. The one drug I needed to save my life was methotrexate, which causes miscarriage. And if I tried to carry on without it, the baby would be severly disabled and I would probably lose my life.
It was perhaps the most difficult time of my life. We counseled with a priest who told us that to take methotrexate to save my life was not immoral, because I was taking it to preserve my life, NOT to end the pregnancy. My husband and I prayed, and although it was hard, I went off all medications and put my life and the life of our baby where they belong…in the hands of God. My 2 oldest kids had a hard time with my decision, which I understand. My two youngest only prayed they could have a new baby in our family. Many friends, even the Catholic friends, were very vocal about what they thought. Comments such as,”How could you do this to your other 4 kids!!” broke my heart. I never felt so alone in all my life.
At 12 weeks along I miscarried. It was difficult and it did put a strain on my health. I had doctors and “friends” telling me “I told you so”…but do we regret it? Not for a second!
A priest we know told us,”This pregnancy was not a loss. You worked with God to create a soul…a soul that was destined to go straight to heaven.”
We all look at others and think what we would do differently. Did I do what was right? I can’t say for sure.
Is it right for a husband and wife to conceive when they know their baby could be born with a disability? I don’t know.
I think the answer lies with you and God. The difficult time we went through was made much more difficult by the remarks and
unsolicited advice of others.
Offer prayers for people you know in these situations.
Offer a listening ear and offer to even babysit the kids to give them a break. Try to imagine how you would feel if you were in their shoes…and how do you think Jesus would speak to them?
I wanted to offer a suggestion to the mom with a nail biter. My daughter was biting her nails for a long time and I managed to get her to stop herself by giving her a bit of a manicure. I took an Emory board and smoothed them all out, and then put some tasteful light pink polish on them. I explained that all the while that taking care of your nails is an important part of being a big girl and when she’s old enough she can grow them out long like mommy’s. That seemed to appeal to her and we do a mini-mani about once a week now. Although sometimes we leave out the polish since it’s not allowed at her school. It’s a great opportunity for bonding and she’ll know how to take care of her nails when she gets a little older. My daughter still bites them occasionally when she’s scared or anxious, but it only takes a quick reminder and she’ll stop (and usually ask for a file to fix what she’s bitten off!)
Good luck!
Yes, but what do we do with little boy nail biters? My 3 1/2 year-old son does the same thing described earlier.
Kristina- So sorry to hear about your husband. I just said a prayer for you.
Sleep deprived- I know all about that. When my twins were born, I also had a 20 month old and for the first 6 weeks, I was lucky to get more than an hour of sleep in a row and many nights got only 3 or 4 hours (I exclusively breastfed both). That sounds awful, but somehow you keep going, with the grace of God I am sure. When my mom and MIL volunteered to come and stay for a week each, did I hesitate to accept? No way! Take all offers of help and have a list of specifics if anyone says, is there anything I can do? Yeah, dinner would be great. Or could you throw on a load of laundry? Or the carpet is really bugging me, would you mind vacuuming. Or would you mind watching the older one so I can take a nap when the baby is napping. Many people would love to help if you give them a suggestion!
And I still don’t get enough sleep (we now have a 4 yr. old, almost 3 yr twins, and a 13 month), but it is so worth it! But like someone else said, do take some time for yourself once in a while. Every day my goal is to get everyone to take a nap (or quiet time) at the same time. That keeps me sane!
Dear Hayley~
My heart goes out to you…I had three terrible sleepers within four years, and sleep deprivation was real fear of mine each time I found out I was pregnant, and I understand you mean more than just “really tired.”
1. I would concentrate on getting the elder child into a nap routine before the baby arrives. Then when the baby arrives, you can nap/nurse him or her at those times (do learn to lie down and nurse on your big bed — my husband didn’t want to “co-sleep” as a family, but I did plenty of “co-sleeping” during the day, when it was just me and the baby in the bed). Eventually (give yourself months) turn those times into a nap for the baby, big one, and yourself. Protect these times from visitors, errands, meetings, and playdates! You need your sleep, and they need theirs!
2. Also, in the early weeks, consider taking shifts with your husband at night. My husband would wake me only if the baby needed nursing during certain hours.
3. Consider Mylicon for gas if your baby is really fitful and doesn’t sleep more than a short snatch at a time.
It seemed that I would never get a full night’s sleep, but here I am, with my youngest at 2 1/2, and I slept from 11:30 last night until 6:15 this morning. Bliss! With each child, my need for sleep decreased, my joy at seeing them in the middle of the night increased, and I learned that I wasn’t doing anything “wrong.” A dear LaLeche leader told me it’s the bright ones who don’t like to sleep!
Amy,
the comment which suggests putting yogurt “down there” really does work.Just make sure that you are not using a yogurt with sugar. the sugar will actually feed the yeast and make matters worse.
Amy ~ something that’s worked really well for me, also, is oil of oregano. You can look here for info: http://www.fungusfocus.com/html/oil_of_oregano.htm
My ob recommended “Rephresh’ to help with yeast or bv during pregnancy. It helps normalize your pH levels and is safe during pregnancy. You can usually find in next to the monistat at the drugstore.
yeast infections. Being on an antibiotic always gives me one. My at home remedy approved by a doctor is an acidophilus capsule by mouth and down there. Also I find that the longer treatments of monistat, etc. work better than their quick fixes. If they are frequent enough I would go to the doctor and get some real medicine.
Kristina-
Please know I am thinking of you and praying for you. A friend of mine lost her husband in February to cancer. I don’t know how she’s carried on/ Email me if you would like to get in touch with her: rachelrimmer@hotmail.com
I don’t think she knows anyone struggling with the loss of their spouse. You are in my thoughts and prauers today!
ooops- prayers!
Kristina, I was thinking that your husband must have died the same day as our beloved deacon. He was a mainstay of our parish life and will be much missed by all. One of his most important ministries was the bereavement ministry. He spent many hours with families and spouses, just being with them. He would know your fears and grief. I will offer a special prayer that both Deacon A and your husband are with Jesus and that both families will find peace and healing. Cyber hugs to you.
Amy,
I picked up my copy of Fertility, Cycles and Nutrition by Marilyn Shannon and have a couple more suggestions for you beside “airing out”, wearing natural fibers, reducing sugar and starch intake, and eating yogurt. She suggests taking acidophilus capsules with each meal. You can get them at health food stores. I would think they would be safe during pregnancy as they are the “good” bacteria our body already should possess. She also recommends Vitamin A, B6 and magnesium and to reduce your caffeine intake.
Good riddance to the yeast!
Boy Nail Biters:
My 7 year old has the same problem. He bites down until it bleeds. The only thing that I have found which will work is harsh (I’m almost ashamed to admit it, but it is the only thing that works) – Tabasco sauce. Brush onto nails whenever I see him biting them. If it is looking like he has been at night (which is usually the case), brush on before bed.
I say this is harsh becuase he has acciendtally got it into his eyes once before. I cried for him! I am just so desperate because I am afraid that he will lose his nails entirely.
Wish I could be more help!
Oh, man, I can never remember what day it is! I have a question to ask, but by the time I get to this site it’s dinnertime and there’s already a great discussion in play. I will just have to ask next week.
First, to the young woman who just lost her husband—my heart goes out to you, my dear. Really. The only “suggestion” I ever make anymore re: such terrible losses are these: Grieve! Your own way. As long as it takes. Forever if it takes that long. Don’t let anyone tell you “how” to go through this process.
Second, re: the nailbiting—I was a nail-biter as a child; one of my daughters was, as well. My mom put a bitter tasting solution on my nails (this was A LONG time ago—45 years or so) that she got at the pharmacy. I remember reading the label. One of the ingredients was gunpowder! Can you believe it? And, I will tell you — even that did not work. I stopped chomping at my nails at some point in my life (perhaps adulthood?); my daughter stopped biting hers, and I cannot remember when. I say, just let it go if at all possible. I’m not sure there is any way to stop a nail-biter.
Finally, hey, I’m just gonna admit right out loud, that I’d go for the biggest diamond I could get. In fact, I did, and I was only 18 years old. I loved that ring.
I posted my pathetic complaint above before reading anything — and simply had to say how sorry I was to read Kristina’s post.
Kristina — I am offering the rest of my sufferings of pregnancy for you and your kids. You are in my prayers.
Thank you to all who commented for my situation. I am able to view my friend’s decisions now with more clarity and understanding of her personal choice. I just couldn’t see any other side through my own narrow view. I knew asking here was the right thing to do. Thank you and God bless you, ladies.
Ditto to all who advised against telling the hubby that you would prefer a different ring.
I have never liked my engagement ring but it is the one he placed on my finger that fateful day and I could never change it. I think it would crush him.
Kristina…
I pray that, at some point tonight, you can sit at your computer and read all the prayers we are sending to you. You are living our worst fear—you are so brave, even to be getting out of bed. Just look at the thread of comments, all those prayers for you and your family…you do have a place where you can let this out.
My father died suddenly six years ago this month.
I cannot even imagine your pain.
You are in my prayers. Remember that Mary was a widow and that she lost her son in a horrific way.
God Bless you and console you.
momofsome – We use the shells of our Happy Heiney cloth diapers.
Kristina, you are surely in my prayers. I am so sorry for your loss.
Amy/Yeast – I concur with everything that has been said! My little one and I struggled with thrush for months, and a combination of probiotics and diet changes finally got us cleared up. I think the name of the book I read was The Yeast Connection, and there’s a cookbook and website.
Hayley – My 1st 2 are 19 months apart and Jonah, my oldest was HORRIBLE sleeper. Have no fear. All kids are different and my 2nd was an awesomely serene child. She slept and ate wonderfully. She must have used up all of her serenity though, because now she’s a surly 4 yr old. 😉
Its a bit of a challenge to juggle to young ones, but surprisingly, I rarely had a problem with them waking each other up. It only happened once or twice.
Try not to imagine the worst, even though the general public may make comments to the contrary. You will make this work out. And I’m betting your daughter will just love her new sibling.
As a funny aside. The my oldest wasn’t home yet when we brought our daughter home from the hospital on that 1st day home. When he got there, she was laying in the pack n play and he just assumed that she appeared there. Every once in awhile he would go back and look in there to see if we had gotten another baby, too. LOL It was really cute.
Blessings to you!
I understand your concern for you friend and her children. It is alot to have 3 kids with enormous and painful medical conditions. And to know that you will definitely pass that along to the next one must be hard to bear when you see the suffering of your kids in front of you. I think we all agree that children with disabilities are beautiful gifts from God but it is certainly reasonable to exercise caution because of the responsibility you have to keep your marriage strong and meet the needs of your first 3 kids.
Perhaps you could talk with her more about it and get some deeper reflections from her on the subject besides “she wants to have another because she wants 6 kids.” Is it really all about a specific number? I don’t understand that. Is there a reason she wouldn’t choose adoption?
I value the thoughts and wisdom of close friends. Although the decision to have another is between myself, husband and God.
If you are close enough to her I think it would be helpful to talk to her about it.
I have trouble reconciling the theology of leaving it up to God and “you will only get pregnant if God wants you too”. If that were the case we would have no discerning and praying to do as married couples about the huge responsiblity we are undertaking in conceiving a child and no need to ever use NFP.
Pregnancy is a biological reality that happens when you have sex when you are fertile. It is a miracle from God, I do agree with that.
Regarding yeast infections – I am pregnant with baby #5 and anticipate a whole lot of yeast infections with every pregnancy. I probably have about 6 per pregnancy. I take lots and lots of acidophilus and probiotics orally each day. This has helped a bit. I find the Trader Joe brand most effective. My Dr also prescribes a 3 day suppository that works. I refuse to use any over the counter treatment any more because the pregnancy yeast infections are in a league unto themselves and my copay is the same price as the 7 day over the counter. I’ll take 3 days over 7 any time.
Gentian violet, although messy, works great for thrush and can be used for yeast infections.
Blessings to you from a fellow sufferer. It’s just one more sacrifice to offer up along with the shortness of breath and constant bathroom visits. Good thing we believe in redemptive suffering.
Lindsay
You openly say that you have never liked your ring but would never ask for another because your husband would be crushed. Honestly I would confide in my husband before admitting it on a blog to a group of people. I think most husbands would rather know the truth, though it may sting a bit at first than to someday find out that you are wearing a ring that you despise. Sometimes good communication means hearing things that you don’t want to hear. Would you want to know if your husband disliked a personal gift that you gave to him by him telling you or would you rather find out another way? I feel honesty is the best policy. If I felt as you do I would find a loving way to express my feelings. Just another way to look at it .
Thanks to all of you who shared your opinions on ring upgrades .I have sent this coffee talk link to my friend who can read the opinions of all of you real women. As one commenter pointed out, there were comments on the linked page but I felt that this Coffee talk group’s opinions would be of more valuable to my friend as she is also a Catholic Mom .Of course there are women out there who want the best of everything for themselves with no regard to how it makes anyone else feel or how much anyone else has to suffer for them to have what they want but this is not the case with this group. Thanks to all who shared openly and honestly.
Thank you for your prayers and for stopping by to see my blog. I needed those prayers today. I found the anniversary gift he had tucked away already for our anniversary in August. Each year he got me a piece of the Precious Moment Birthday Train. Next month would have been our 16th anniversary. The “16th” piece of the train is a white tiger…. my favorite animal. I can’t believe he had it already, as just last month he came me #15…. a little (well, a lot) late 🙂