After receiving my first newsletter last week, a reader sent me the following:
Your message was spot on about Wonder Woman, but sometimes I forget to do some of these things and get frustrated. I had my 7th baby in January of this year and ever since, I feel more like Horriblewoman, forgetting things, feeling overwhelmed, wanting to sign up to help out at moms groups, but winding up not even going because the two I have at home with me (8 mos and 2 1/2 years) are just too much for me to now manage.
At one point in my younger journey as mom, I had 4 under the age of 5 and could get 10 things accomplished at once! My five school age children (15, 14, 12, 10, 7) are so busy at school and each have one activity they’re involved in (we really only can handle one activity per child and it seems they all are fall sports/activities this year), but I can’t shake this feeling of inadequacy. It’s really as though baby #7 sucked all the desire, ability, and action out of me.
I think every mom can relate to these sentiments. And truly, when I write about every mom being Wonder Woman, I do mean every mom — especially those who are struggling and feeling inadequate. That’s when we most need the reminder that we are everyday heroes in our homes and families.
Sometimes being that hero means nothing more than getting yourself out of bed in the morning and signing on for another go-around on the ride of life. Sometimes being a hero means “just” nursing that fussy baby or “just” folding one more basket of laundry or “just” managing to keep everyone fed and clothed in whatever way you can manage that day.
We all have times in our lives where we feel on top of things and in control. And we all have times in our lives when we feel inadequate, overwhelmed, and desperate for support. It’s during the more trying times that we must admit something that’s been true all along — that the feeling of control we sometimes enjoy is only a pleasant illusion. Every one of us is dependent upon the grace of God every minute of every day. We are nothing, we accomplish nothing, we are worth nothing without Him.
As for your personal situation, I would encourage you to accept the fact that there is not a lot of “extra” you can manage right now. Personally speaking, I find having older children at the same time as having younger children and juggling multiple outside activities to be absolutely depleting in a way that the “many babies” years were not. It’s okay to admit how hard it sometimes is.
Each stage of motherhood and family life comes with its own unique challenges and joys. What you describe your family as right now sounds like a very full and demanding life! Being Wonder Woman right now does not mean taking on more responsibilities or helping out anyone but your own family.
God has uniquely qualified YOU to be a perfect gift to your family. You are the wife and mother he means to be the heart of your home. He has given you unique gifts of strength, compassion, love, and sensitivity that you are meant to use in the service of your family right now.
The devil would love to use this opportunity to convince you that you are not a good mom and you are failing at the important stuff. He lies. You need to be too busy living out your vocation and loving your family to hear anything he has to say. Focusing on working for your family and offering it up for the greater glory of God makes you a super hero, my friend.
Wear the bracelet, Mama, and wear it proud.