Comments on: Coffee Talk Tuesday

By: Jennifer Minson

Jennifer Minson — Thu, 22 May 2008 02:08:31 +0000

To the afraid of baths mom- my youngest was the same way, bath, shower, hated them, screamed bloody murder. We tried showering with her, just putting her in at the end of siblings bath, going way too long without bathing. What changed her attitude was watching her siblings at swimming lessons. They were having a great time and all of a sudden it looked more interesting.

By: heather

heather — Thu, 22 May 2008 01:05:17 +0000

Joan – I think it is beautiful that your cousin and her husband have such a wonderful marraige. However, I must say that for most teens, especially in the present condition of our culture where kids are just “hooking up” and having “friends with benefits” (yeah that’s what they call it…no real romantic realtionship or anything,just getting together for sex, and that’s what was portrayed in the movie Juno), this is very uncommon. And it is wrong to give kids the idea that they can do this stuff and expect “true love” in the end.

By: Jennifer (Et Tu?)

Jennifer (Et Tu?) — Wed, 21 May 2008 22:22:41 +0000

May -

I just wanted to second what everyone else has said about considering help in terms of getting some kind of break for yourself. I cannot tell you how much doing so impacted my own life. It required some thinking outside of the box since our budget is very tight, but it seriously made the difference between sanity and insanity for me. Keep in mind that we women weren’t meant to raise children all on our own with no help and no breaks, that living in isolation as so many of us do is a historically new phenomenon. It’s very psychologically difficult. I’m a big believer that it can be overcome, however, if we realize that having a little help and some breaks is not a “nice to have” but a “must-have” and prioritize accordingly.

I actually had an old website on this subject and talked with a lot of women about the importance of these things and the psychological impact it can have when we don’t have them. You wouldn’t believe some of the stories I heard! Please feel free to email me if you’d like to chat about it some more.

What wonderful discussions! I wish I could reply to them all. Have a great rest of the week, everyone.

By: Joan

Joan — Wed, 21 May 2008 21:18:40 +0000

To Heather,

My cousin and her husband had a teen pregnancy. They have been married for over 30 years and have 5 children, and 2 grandchildren. So, sometimes things do work out. Just some insight.

By: anon

anon — Wed, 21 May 2008 21:07:30 +0000

Thank you, thank you, thank you for the advice regarding my son. God bless you all

I will pray for you and your struggles as well.

By: Gina

Gina — Wed, 21 May 2008 20:57:27 +0000

Diane and Alice-

Thank you SO much for your advice. This helps a lot. And Diane, I really appreciate your prayers. God bless!

By: Diane

Diane — Wed, 21 May 2008 20:34:59 +0000

Alice& Gina,
Thank’s you are so right. Unfortunately in my case the school was not wanting an opinion of an independent doctor and required their psychiatrist to evaluate my son. In the state of Ohio, the school is bound to set up this sort of evaluation within thirty days and have it done by the sixtieth day. We were personally better off for this in that our doctor had seen my son so much and had such a thick file that he left a lot out of his report The schools psychiatrist on the other hand left no doubt that it was the huge classes that caused my son to loose concentration. This doctor was also aware of what special classes were available and was able to recommend one which had fewer students but still maintained grade level academics since my son is very bright. Like I said before do what it takes . Though your doctor ‘s report may not be accepted it may be what you need to get the ball rolling. Also I forgot to mention that the school counselor would be a great advocate if a diversion program is not available to you

By: Alice

Alice — Wed, 21 May 2008 17:41:49 +0000

Diane and Gina,

In my state (and this is possibly a national thing), it is getting MUCH harder to get a struggling student tested and put on an IEP. You should schedule a conference with your child’s teachers and the principal ASAP; however, do not be surprised if they tell you that they can no longer test your child for learning disabilities right away. If this is the case in your state (and the school administrators should know this), talk with your family doctor or pediatrician. Insurance may cover the testing and you will actually get results much faster. Some parents also say that the doctor’s tests are much more accurate. It’s a lot of work, but in most of the cases I’ve seen it IS worth it.

By: Mary B

Mary B — Wed, 21 May 2008 16:14:24 +0000

Dear Anon/ is son gay?

I would recommend reading the Bishops’ letter: “Always Our Children” which addresses parents whose children confirm they are dealing with gender issues. I found myself avoiding the letter but finally did this past Lent. My husband and I also went through it together. I found it reasuring and yet very realistic.

The number one thing you want to do over the next decade is develop a relationship where your child understands you will discuss ANYTHING no matter how difficult or painful. We need to be worst case prepared as parents:
if my child decides to live out a life that is contrary to the teachings of the Faith at some point in their lives, how do I draw them back and set an example.

Let’s just say its been a LONG year in our home which I wouldn’t trade in spite of my increasingly gray hair!

Juno: Brought up an interesting question in our house: Mom, you wouldn’t really say it would be better to be on drugs than be pregnant right? Answer: I will love you and help you through anything! If any of you has an unplanned pregnancy I will help you with adoption, or raising baby or anything! Here is the pregancy crisis center number……

By: More Defiant Children

More Defiant Children — Wed, 21 May 2008 14:59:46 +0000

I also issues with my oldest son. He exhibits many of the behaviors I saw mentioned. I think a lot of his problems stem from his relationship with my husband (his father). But maybe it is a combination of things.

I have been praying for miracles in our family. My husband and son did not speak for 8 months and finally they began speaking again-Praise God!!

My husband really needs to connect with the Lord and develop a relationship with Him. He desires to be more faithful but so far he doesn’t “feel” anything. He does attend mass every Sunday even if he goes alone at times. He prays the rosary occasionally and I see that as a good sign.

I am sorry if I am rambling….I just needed to vent.